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Now, I know that all of you evangelical Christians have been waiting for Jesus to come back, and get all you guys into heaven. Stop waiting, for I have found new, better saviors, who are already right here on earth. They are the Formaldehyde Junkies.

Coming out of perhaps the coolest city in the Midwest, Minneapolis, the Junkies play fast, crazy hardcore punk rock not unlike the early `80s D.C. or Boston scenes. Are a Total Wreck, their first EP, is a latter-day masterpiece of punk rock. In a few short minutes, FJ channels the speed of the F.U.’s , the conviction of Minor Threat, and the snotty attitude of Government Issue, without sounding like a crappy tribute band.

It’s basically pointless to dissect the individual songs on the disc, because they all run together. I’m not even sure if there’s any banding between the tracks. Anyway, it’s like one really, really good hardcore song. The guitar sound fills the speakers, and come just close of drowning out the vocals, but manages to leave a little space. The vocals are shouted clearly, without any throat-scraping bullshit.

The lyrics are, for the most part, unintelligible, buried just below the awesome, awesome guitar. The band helpfully included the choruses of each song on the Xeroxed insert, so that you can shout along at their shows.

From this review, it may not sound so great, but that’s just because I’m a shitty writer. But please, mail order this (you’re not gonna find it anywhere else). This EP has more heart, and certainly more balls, than any of the major label, corporate-funded pop music on this site. It’s good to see that punk rock can still be dangerous, and that hardcore can still be “hard” without having breakdowns and rapped vocals. I cannot wait until the Formaldehyde Junkies put out an LP.



People who liked this also liked:
Rudimentary Peni - The EPs of RPFear - The RecordThe Formaldehyde Junkies - The Formaldehyde Junkies [7 inch]Vibrators - Pure ManiaExtreme Noise Terror - A Holocaust In Your HeadSairaat Mielet - Controversial History 1988-1993Various - Flex Your Head [remastered]Los Crudos - DiscografiaHeresy - 1985-`87Dystopia - Human = Garbage



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    Posted by JakeRazor on 2006-12-19 16:34:30
    My Score:

    Oh, and a little bit of chaos is different from macho fighting. Punks seem to forget than sometimes. C'mon! Go nuts! Jeezus, don't be a jock-type asshole but don't be afraid to raise some hell!

    Posted by JakeRazor on 2006-12-19 16:32:15
    My Score:

    THIS EP IS GREAT AND SO IS THIS BAND

    Haven't seen them live yet but I CAN'T WAIT!!!

    THIS IS HOW GODDAMN HARDCORE PUNK SHOULD SOUND!

    Posted by SilentStorms on 2006-07-25 15:52:55

    I've never seen this band so I wasn't labelling, I'm just reading the posts.

    Posted by WilliamMarinovic on 2006-07-25 12:48:39

    I really have no idea what the fuck you're talking about. When I've seen this band, it's just been a short burst of fun. If anyone would bother familiarizing themselves with this band and bands like them, they'd realize how off the "macho hardcore" tag is.

    Posted by SilentStorms on 2006-07-25 01:18:33

    Fighting/Violence isn't in my punk perspective. But it may be in yours. I just hope it isn't, or we'll have to fight. Just joking. But c'mon I thought punk was about mutual respect and attempting to understand what we normallly wouldn't even give a chance? Or am I waaaaay off base? Oh and politics and anarchy and mosh pits with really big mohawks. Maybe I'm just a neo-punk.

    Posted by WilliamMarinovic on 2006-07-22 12:21:42

    The S/T came out this year, the demo is older, but it's a demo, not an actual release.

    Posted by Anonymous on Saturday, July 22, 2006 at 3:14 AM (EDT)

    im pretty sure this isnt their first 7
    what about the s/t or the 2005 demo......i dunno the order of them, but all i know is im probably gonna see these dudes on mother fuckin sunday at the alamo
    and just for fun i learned the lead singer andy doesnt even remember the lyrics live, but who cares this band has kept me from killing myself and renewed my hope in music because this shit is actually exciting and even better its not a shitty kid dynamite rip-off band

    Posted by theOneTrueBill on 2006-07-22 02:50:53

    "4 chord punk."

    HOLY SHIT!!!!

    just kidding. I really gotta get this, the songs I've heard are great.

    Posted by WilliamMarinovic on 2006-07-22 01:55:57

    Hey Keith, I'm a hemophiliac and I wouldn't go to shows like this if it was really that life threatening. I've never sustained a serious injury, and the "violence" gladimnotemo is describing is more of a personal outlet of the music, not macho guys trying to prove their manhoods by beating up guys. DIY Hardcore shows are not like that. This is F Junkies, dude, not Madball.

    And Steve, check out the Surf Nazis demo, they have a sweet sample from the movie, and the music is fun as hell 4 chord punk.

    Posted by Keith19 on 2006-07-21 23:53:49

    FIGHTING each other while they played, getting TACKLED by the audience, throwing instruments, BOTTLES FLYING.....

    Posted by gladimnotemo on 2006-07-21 23:24:45

    Violence? Just because someone gets tackled doesn't make it violent...you're reading into that way too much, I think.

    Posted by BizzleBrizzle on 2006-07-21 23:03:50

    "If you question why that's a good thing, GTFO of punk."

    I just don't get why violence is so awesome. It does nothing. And punk is all about vioence? OK.


    No but it shouldn't be safe either.

    Posted by Keith19 on 2006-07-21 22:38:09

    "If you question why that's a good thing, GTFO of punk."

    I just don't get why violence is so awesome. It does nothing. And punk is all about vioence? OK.

    Posted by stevejonestherealbones on 2006-07-21 22:23:25


    If you like them check out Surf Nazis Must Die.


    no matter how you feel about the band, check out the movie, Surf Nazis Must Die too

    i actually didnt know there was a band. perhaps 'll check em out

    - jones the bones

    - stevejones8770@yahoo.com

    Posted by wcgandy on 2006-07-21 17:06:58
    My Score:

    they're not edge. they were trying to score adderall when they played in duluth.

    just thought i'd clear the gossip up.

    Posted by gladimnotemo on 2006-07-21 17:03:29

    When they started playing in Pittsburgh, someone tackled Andy Petersen and I don't think he ever made it up during the set again.

    If you question why that's a good thing, GTFO of punk.

    Posted by Keith19 on 2006-07-21 15:14:00

    "Saw 'em in Chicago at the Blackout...Fucking AWSOME live band. 12 minutes of pure mayhem. Fighting each other while they played, getting tackled by the audience, throwing instruments, bottles flying"

    Why is that good time?

    Posted by gladimnotemo on 2006-07-21 14:55:01
    My Score:

    Yeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssssss.

    Posted by skankin_in_the_pit on 2006-07-21 10:07:51
    My Score:

    I definitely wasn't expecting to see this reviewed here. Awesome 7". If I could write I'd review a lot of stuff like this, so I'm glad other people are submitting these here.

    Posted by Anonymous on Friday, July 21, 2006 at 6:08 AM (EDT)

    Great band. yep

    Posted by TahoeJeff on 2006-07-21 03:26:14

    Wait...Minneapolis is the coolest city in the Mid-west? Thats like saying Gonnorhea tickles.

    Posted by Anonymous on Friday, July 21, 2006 at 3:19 AM (EDT)

    Saw 'em in Chicago at the Blackout...Fucking AWSOME live band. 12 minutes of pure mayhem. Fighting each other while they played, getting tackled by the audience, throwing instruments, bottles flying.....it was great! Both 7"s are quite worthy.

    ~Petro B.

    Posted by WilliamMarinovic on 2006-07-21 00:24:56

    Yeah, this band is truly great. I submitted a less lengthy review for their newer EP, though I think they sound more Teen Idles than Minor Threat, and I don't believe they're edge at all.

    Still, I can't imagine music being much more fun than this.

    If you like them check out Surf Nazis Must Die.