Infinite Missiles

Rage Till We Die: Demo 2007 (2007)

feeeding5000

Allow me to be blunt: Municipal Waste has destroyed an entire generation of metal bands. Okay, maybe that's an overstatement, but the fact is that, much like the Highlander, there can only be one jokey, pop-culture obsessed, drunken 1980s-revival crossover thrash band, and that is Muni Waste. The world does not need throngs of denim-clad young men pretending that it is 1987. Joliet, IL's Infinite Missiles do not seem to understand this, and have decided to create a demo CD to show the world just how brainless and immature they can be.

The demo, Rage Till We Die 2007, is musically pretty competent. Infinite Missiles covers a standard thrash sound, but leans toward a speedier hardcore sound over the galloping rhythms of speed metal. The drums are generally spot-on, with drummer Eddie Cantu providing a steady background without getting too reliant on either blast-beats or double bass. Wanky, tapped guitar solos bring the over-the-top quality of heavy metal to the band's generally hardcore-style riffs. The band keeps their sound grounded in hardcore with nasally shouted vocals and gang choruses, which create a dynamic surprisingly similar to that of classic bands like Boston's Slapshot or NYC's Cro-Mags.

Infinite Missiles fails miserably, however, in their Waste-worshipping "humorous" lyrics. Disc opener "Order 66" is a reference to Revenge of the Sith, and even I, an avowed Star Wars fan (my dog is named Chewbacca, for fuck's sake!) hated that movie. Of course there's a theme song, "Infinite Missiles," which, from what I can gather, is about video games. "Ooo, Freddy's Nails" tackles the truly pressing issue of being attacked by Freddy Krueger (see what I mean about pretending that it's 1987?); "Dude Soup" brings new insight to the growing problem of parties with too many dudes (defined as the "Sausagefest Conundrum," after sociologist Dr. Earl Sausagefest); and "Unleash the Fury" seems to have something to do with either kicking ass or being metal -- or both. The demo is finished off with a cover of Slayer's "The Antichrist," presumably because "Raining Blood" would've been "too fuckin' obvious, bro!"

Ultimately, Infinite Missiles is an acceptable diversion, but neither a truly interesting nor a truly original one. If you need something to jam on the cassette deck in your rusted orange Gremlin while waiting for your Gorditos with extra "queso," Rage Till We Die might be worth getting. Otherwise, just listen to the ‘Waste, bro.