i am a 17 year old kid, and i live in arlington, virginia. after being dismissed from an art class around 9:35, i was standing in the parking lot of the school waiting for a friend to get me a cassette tape from his car. hearing the jet before i saw it, reacting to the noise i looked up and saw a commercial airliner flying low, and flying fast. an american airline jet, heading in a direction that obviously was not towards reagan national airport. we had received a vague announcement in class about the world trade center being attacked by planes, but it wasn't until after i watched the airliner disappear beneath the tree line that it really hit me. "that plane is going to crash, jesus christ, that plane is going to crash," was all that made it into my mind. an eery three or four seconds later there was a large rumbling sound and what looked like a tower of fire and thin dust and smoke rose into my vision. the plane that had just flown over my shoulder, close enough that i could have hit it with a baseball, and jesus, i had seen the plane seconds before it was over. over for the passengers. my friends and i thought for sure it had hit the pentagon, the building was right where the jet would have crashed.
i wonder now if i had seen anyone in the windows of the jet, if maybe they had seen me. had they looked me in the eye? i can barely comprehend it. the smoke rising from the crash, less than half a mile away was slowly getting darker and thicker. all that i knew was that people had died. people had lost people. family had lost family, and friends. and it was all so helpless. the anxious, shaky feeling brought on immediately would not go away for hours. i had never been so shaken. that's when i realized how selfish i was being. as close as i was, as near as i was to ending up crushed or burnt by an airplane, i am safe. i wish with my entire heart that i could say the same about the thousands of people in the pentagon and those that were in the world trade center, and especially those that suffered the longest, the passengers of the four hijacked jets. those who witnessed this, those who have lost someone, the americans that have been affected drastically by such an attack. i know for sure that i am not alone in expressing my deepest sorrow for those killed today, september eleventh. i wish i could do more than write. i tried. i drove up and down lee highway looking for people walking home from DC that i could offer rides home to. i just wish i could do something. i watched a rocket, a missile filled with PEOPLE headed for a building, a symbol of the united states of america, filled with fellow americans. with my eyes blurry my only thought is shock, soaked in sadness, knowing that i can't do anything. but i don't want to retaliate. i want to rewind the world, and see this never happened.

"yesterday i counted my demons, today i counted my blessings" - Julia Collins.

sincerely sorry,

matthew hovey kemp.

send this to someone else if you think they should see it. it is important you understand that i am not asking, nor deserving any sympathy. i do not want any. channel it towards those who deserve it. i live in arlington. my home was attacked. our home.