Saves the Day Takes Shit

NEW JERSEY (AP) - In Reverie, upon leaving the rectum of Saves the Day singer-guitarist Chris Connelly, was picked out of the toilet bowl and released by Universal imprint Dreamworks Records several months ago under the radar. The Associated Press was only recently informed of the situation from Connelly himself.

"I had some bad diarrhea that week, I'm surprised I got a solid poopy out at all," Connelly told AP. "I noticed it was kind of in the shape of a compact disc, and we hadn't had a release in two years, so i figured 'what the hell,' why not release a release?"

Connelly admitted to some bad geek rock indulgences prior to the bowel movement. He claims to have taken a Weezer laxative to finally squeeze it out.

He said, "Rivers Cuomo called, he wanted his chord progressions back. No, really, look." Connelly then proceeded to show AP his cell phone's call log, which had indeed shown several received calls from Cuomo daily since the release date.

"I was wailing like a little school-girl during the whole thing. I guess that's alright though, because it translated to the music and seems like the only sort of emotion that came out of it anyway," Connelly said. "It was a really slow process, boring at times...really boring."

In response to the mild violence that had far preceded the release, like digging out blue eyes, sawing off flesh, and drinking blood, Connelly said, "Well, I'm just a calm person now. The only violence that happened here were the firecrackers exploding out my [behind] like a fourth of July barbecue."

The Juliana Theory did not wish to comment on the competition.